Taking the Next Step

You will swear to all that you never saw it coming. You have absolutely no idea how or when you ballooned up to 500 pounds. Admit it or don’t, but you did see it approaching. It sped towards you like a freight train on its track. You shove from your mind any recollection of the nights you pulled through Taco Bell and ordered $20 worth of burritos, on your way to pick up the pizza you were having for dinner with your roommate. You conveniently lost count of the hundreds…and more probably thousands of Quarter pounders with cheese you shoveled through your mouth, every single day, as if you might never eat again. It was an addiction…a compulsion, an obsession with food. Your body craved its food fix as bad as any junkie might hunger for their own drug of choice or worse, necessity.
Oh yeah, the signs were there, screaming at you. You could see your eyes pleading with you in the mirror each time you washed your hands or brushed your teeth. Your knees cried out whenever you struggled to your feet. Your heart strained and battled to beat in a consistent cadence while your lungs wheezed and gasped for air. There is no denying the ghastly reality of your disorder or the unmistakable circumstances that nearly led to your demise. Denial is a coping skill, however, not a skill one can ever brag about.
Facing this aggressive demon is difficult, in part, because the world is not sympathetic to your plight. “Why can’t you just go on a diet” they shout or “Get up and exercise! You’re just being lazy” is another bit of “skinny people” wisdom. The truth of the matter is this; if you find yourself growing out of your clothes or furniture you have a problem. When your weight begins to control every facet of your life, you must get help. You will not do it on your own. You need the support of a group such as Weight Watchers to espouse and encourage you. If you reach the morbidly obese status, you must get professional help. It will not go away on its own. This addiction will devour your soul and leave you sick, hopeless and alone if it first doesn’t steal your actual life.
Believe me when I tell you that there is hope and there is promise. You have it within you to do battle with this addiction. I myself weighed 528 pounds, I had a quick-fix surgery 14 years ago lost 200 pounds and gained most of it back. For the past three years I have battled for my life. I have fought the monster and I am winning. I have lost 250 pounds through hard work, WW support and counseling. Since New year’s eve, however, I find myself at a plateau, facing a brick wall in my weight loss program. I have even gained a few pounds. With that being said, today, my friends, I begin the next phase of my weight loss journey. I will amp up and continue with the Weight Watcher’s Point system, but today I begin Training with Natalie Heckert (from the BIGGEST LOSER show) and her E-Fit work out program. I have NEVER been one to exercise or use any type of equipment but Natalie has expressed her profound faith in my ability to restart my weight loss. She has so much confidence, in fact that she has made me her official spokesperson! I have always been a very skeptical person when it comes to gadgets and quick weight loss solutions…so I begin very cautiously. I will not try and convince anyone to try the product unless, of course, it begins to make a huge difference in my life. I have unpacked the product, much like I might open a Christmas gift under the tree. I am filled with hope and anticipation as I pull the pieces out of the box. I can only trust that Natalie is right and it will indeed help me get back on track. We will all experiment together and see what happens. Watch my progress on here or on my Facebook page – Pick a Struggle Cupcake.
There was a time when I could not wait to fall asleep at night. I would dwell in heavy slumber as long as possible for these midnight dreams were my only escape from the solemn reality which was my life. These days, I climb into bed late and open my eyes to watch the sunrise outside my window. I appreciate the realization that I am healing and on my way to a full recovery, because suddenly, an ordinary day… is better than an extraordinary dream.